I'm Grateful, Damnit.

I find myself more and more dissatisfied these days. Could require medication; definitely a shrink - but for now, I'm going to force some gratefulness down my throat and blog about the bright side.

I am grateful because:

1. I'm not Octomom. Just imagine, 280 nails to trim.

2. I have a roof over my head and do not reek of urine.

3. Along those same lines, I have indoor plumbing. There was a time when I lived in a "dry" cabin in Alaska. Two toddlers and an outhouse. (There you go, TLC, another reality show idea) Hot shower is luxury. Grunt.

4. I have food to last until my next paycheck but did not have enough to buy halloween candy. I may avoid this year's downward spriral that begins in the halloween candy aisle and lasts until the last drop of cheap Champagne has been drunk on New Year's Eve. Thens starts up again two weeks later.

5. I had enough money this month to take my nasty Mutt to the vet, get her nasty ear infection treated, and have her nasty fleas irradicated.

6. It was fleas on the dogs and not lice on the kids.

7. All 5 of my senses work, even if I am frequently greeted at home to the sound of shrieking and the smell of garlic, poopy diapers, and nasty Mutt. How can I complain when I am able to see the glorious fall colors and a looming harvest moon, all in one day?

8. I have a job, a smart boss, and about 20 neutral-colored squared feet to call my own. It's not actually my own and my internet usage is monitored, but did I mention the bathrooms are cleaned daily?

9. I do not have meddling friends. Granted, I don't have any friends, but it 's all relative.

10. I may look 7 months pregnant to the stranger in the restroom (true story), but I know my uterus is empty.

Have a great week, everybody!

If you get a chance, leave a comment and let me know what you're grateful for.